Marrying the right person is one of the greater challenges confronting young people in the 21st century. Today, there is a series of teachings regarding marriage from countless motivational speakers, preachers, and marriage experts who teach based on what they know, the experiences they have gathered, both personal and societal, rather than according to the stipulations of the Holy Bible as led by the Holy Spirit. It is not a sin to draw and teach lessons from your walk in life to the younger ones about marriage. But, it becomes imprudent to turn them into doctrinal perspectives, such that, a primary guide to marriage for younger ones.
Marriage is a serious decision that a person will ever make. It affects every spheres of your life; emotional, psychological, spiritual, family structures, and your future. Many people rush into marriage based on pressures, feelings, and attraction. All these have been mentioned can not guarantee a lifetime relationship.
The Bible teaches that God is interested in our marital status. Heb 13:4, “Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” Marital status needs to be cleaned. But, if marriage is honorable in all, what makes marriage more appealing if not for marrying right? When there is rightness, marriage becomes a peaceful haven. When the choice is bad, then comes regret.
Now, let’s talk about these seven important things to understand before choosing a life partner. Explained simply with Biblical understandings.
1. Spiritual Alignment:
To marry right, you need a partner spiritually aligned. The important and first factor to consider in a lady or a man as a believer for marriage is, Who is this man/woman to God? How close is he/she? That question determines a whole lot. “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness?”— 2 Corinthians 6:14 (KJV). Marriage implies the connection of two in unity. When a partner is not as spiritually aligned as you are, problems are born to grow. Your spiritual alignment matters. It is a reality.
2. Beauty Should not Replace Character:
Character is like a building that accommodates. Beauty is like a tender that attracts. Attraction is good and natural, let’s consider that nature itself is not eternal in value. Character determines much about a marriage’s future. The Bible warns that physical attraction is not enough. “Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.” Proverbs 31:30 (KJV).
Character includes kindness, patience, love, and care. These virtues handle rough and bad times. Not beauty. Beauty can bring perplexities to a home. Then, one thing is important in clarifying the character of your partner. How does he/she handle situations? How does he/she handle relationships with your family, friends, strangers, and people who offend them?
3. Childish Behaviours:
Emotional instability produces childish behaviors that then degenerate into a full-blown crisis. You can not afford a partner as a believer who turn every slightest issues to full war and silent moments. Apostle Paul said, when he was a child he did things childishly, and now that he has become a man he put away childish things.
To marry right. A person that understands you is necessary.
4. Future Expectations and Lifetime Goals
Do not marry someone who does not share your future expectations and lifetime goals. “Can two walk together, except they be agreed?”— Amos 3:3 (KJV). Not all believers are spiritually compatible to marry the other.
Identical in faith does not qualify a successful marriage. What is the essence of marrying someone who belittles your life prospects? Imagine marrying someone who does not care about serving the Lord, especially in the gospel field but just lives and enjoys the grace of God at full stop when your ambition is to serve on the gospel field.
5. Communication Matters:
Honest communication matters. Healthy marriages are built on healthy communication. To understand one another, there would be at least communication. When communication is fractured you will leave with someone who offends you and you won’t be able to share how you feel. Or living with someone who doesn’t consider valuable communication with you.
6. Respect and Care:
“Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” — Ephesians 5:33 (KJV). To marry right, choose life partner who respects you and cares about you. Not a person with selfish desires and interests. Not a person who abuse you with provocative statements or insults you. Not a person who don’t care about what you are passing through. Someone who leaves you to your frustrations and worries.
7. Seek God’s Guidance Before Marrying:
Most people make terrible and dreaded mistakes of not praying or praying less about a partner who approaches them. But the same could inform one-kind of spiritual mentors to dictate their partners.
“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”— Proverbs 3:5–6 (KJV).
While you don’t rush. Ask God for help. Trust in the word. Evaluate the person in the light of God’s word and clarification will come. You may seek counsels and guidance, that should be a secondary option.
CONCLUSION
Marrying right is not about finding the All-Perfect Person. But, rather, a person who values, a person who is aligned, a person who cares and matured enough.
A wise choice before marriage can prevent many struggles later. When two people commit to love, respect, and grow together under God’s guidance, marriage becomes a place of strength and blessing.
Taking time to understand these principles allows a person to approach marriage with wisdom rather than impulse.
Oluwadare Ezekiel Ifewonder, A Preacher at the Second Edition of Relationship Talks Week, March 16th 2026 of The Bible Truth Team.
